LOSS THAT IS GAIN

When I first heard this paradoxical statement not so many years ago I was certain that whoever said it didn’t really know what it means to lose something or someone so dear to you. For so long I just brushed this words off and kept asking myself what sought of an insensitive person came up with this. Over the years I have learnt that nothing is truer than this. There is loss that is gain. I wish I had understood this early. I beat myself up so many times in the past for losing people. Friends who I thought would never leave left without an apology or an explanation.

At some point in our lives we lose some people who we all thought would never leave [Disclaimer: am not talking about losing people to death]. I am talking about friends, partners and even family members who quit on us. Having experienced this I completely understand how it feels when these people leave our lives. They leave a gap which is almost always irreplaceable. We feel like all is lost when they leave. But all is never lost. People leave because they want to and however much we beat ourselves up and blame ourselves we never change the fact that they would have left anyways. This however does not mean that we are the good person and everyone that leaves is bad, sometimes people leave because of our shitty values that they could not put up with and for wanting to be better people with people better than us. I know that really bruises our egos but what does truth do better than this?

I never lost anyone worth keeping. Anyone that left wasn’t good enough for my life and instead of losing I gained. Don’t get it twisted, no one is perfect and if anyone leaves us because we are who we are then let them go. We lose some people because we will never grow if we have them around. People leave to slap the fact that no one got us more than God into our heads. Precious lessons are learnt when people let us down, don’t forget to pick them up. I hope you brace yourself up because even if we don’t sign up for this disappointments, they will surely come and when they do I hope you get enough strength to get up and move on. That’s life, sometimes it serves us with what we even didn’t ask for in the first place and it boldly brings it to our plate. We may not want it but we need it.